Day 2

Day 2 was a barber school version of the ‘Red Wedding’ episode from Game Of Thrones.

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An artist’s rendition of our class.

 

I spotted an Iron Maiden houseboat en route to the academy. Clearly, a sign that things were about to get metal.

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But for real, I wanna BFF whoever owns this boat!

Where Day 1 was about the super basics, Day 2 focused on fundamentals and building muscle memory. Specifically, learning “straight cuts” by trimming Kate’s raggedy plastic hair to a perfectly even length all the way around.

We practiced and practiced cutting her hair, leveling up by microscopic intervals. For a while we all got into the straight cut zone, and it almost felt like we’d gotten the hang of that whole “handling barber shears” thing.

Then it happened: BLOOD.

One student nicked his index finger while trimming up a section. We scrambled to find band-aids (“plasters”, they call them here). He got all patched up and went back to work.

MORE BLOOD. Same guy got sliced twice. Shortly thereafter, a 2nd student got nicked.

I’m aware that there is a large quantity of blood gushing around inside our bodies, but the sheer amount of red liquid spurting out of the tiniest finger slit continues to amaze me.

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Finally, it was my turn to bleed. I wish I had a cool or bizarre story related to my first barbering injury, but I don’t.

However, I did learn a valuable lesson from it: If you’re going to wipe hair clumps off a razor-sharp object with your finger, you really should check the angle of your blade first.

I make these kinds of mistakes so that you don’t have to. Also, I blame Kate Tastrophe.

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It’s definitely her fault. ALL of it.

 

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